Vietnam vet, mom connect with a simple thank-you
Boston Herald
April 21, 2003
Joe FITZGERALD

LYNN--Her voice mail message sounded urgent:

"My name is Denise," she said.  "I'm the mother of not only a Marine serving in Iraq, but also a second son serving in the Navy.  And I need to tell you something that just happened."

It turned out Denise Ramsdell, 42, a medical technician from Lynn, had several things on her mind.

"I was going to call when I read about that 71-year-old veteran who tangled with that snotty-nosed college punk," she said.  "Oh, I had tears in my eyes, because that man gave me hope!  Watching all these protesters, I just needed to know there's someone out there who feels exactly the way I do."

"Protesters and critics are getting harder to find," she was told.

"I know.  Now they all want to be on the winning side, just like in sports.  Only this wasn't sports; this was real.  I also have a 12-year-old son who was devastated to think there were people in this country who did not support what his brother was doing."

But that wasn't why she called here, although it was related.

Her story began in the China Lion, a restaurant in downtown Lynn, where she sat waiting for a takeout order.

"Three men at the bar were having a rather passionate debate about the war," she recalled.  "I was listening to them when a girlfriend walked in and asked how my boys were doing.  The men overheard I had a son serving in Iraq.

"One of them turned to me and said, 'Ma'am, the next time you're in touch with your son, you tell him I said thank you, OK?'  And that's when I saw 'Vietnam veteran' printed on his hat."

Ramsdell knew a special moment had just unfolded.  "I grew up with Vietnam in my classroom, literally," she explained.  "Some days our civics teacher at Lynn Classical would turn on the news and that would be our lesson."

So as she studied this man at the bar, who was looking back at her, she found herself replying, "Well, let me thank you, too, for your service to our country."

He seemed taken aback by her response.

"He got up," she remembers, "walked over and said, 'I want to shake your hand.'  I could see his eyes filling up.  As he grabbed my hand, I reached out to hug him and he began sobbing on my shoulder.  He said, "That's the first time in all these years that anyone has ever thanked me.'  Now I was crying, too, so I just said, 'Well, they should have thanked you; we all should have thanked you.'"

She never got his name.

"He was probably in his late 50's, a little guy with glasses, unassuming, maybe 140 pounds, easy to overlook.  But I found out he served in Da Nang."

"Why did you call here?" she was asked.

"Because he reminded me we still haven't made amends as far as these guys are concerned.  A lot of them still haven't gotten over the reception that awaited them when they came home.

"Right now my son is over there fighting, just the way this man fought when he was my boy's age.  These (expletives) who block streets and yell 'blood for oil' are not only having an effect on people like my 12-year-old son, but they're also having an enormous effect on these people we never thanked.  I think it's reminding them of what it was like when they came home, and I don't want my sons coming home to that, too."

"I guess that's why I called.  The day I meet them at the airport, if they have to worry about someone spitting on their uniforms, I'm going to be just like that veteran you wrote about.  You'll find me rolling around on the streets, too, and that's a promise."

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